You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
