thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
