I'll bet she douches with gravy.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
