Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
