just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
