I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
