he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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