We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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