all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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