hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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