She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
