I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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