Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
