Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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