drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
