is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize
