I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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