i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
no you cant smoke seaweed
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Randomize
