I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
