Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
