Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I seem to have left my pride at pride
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
did i walk over a car last night?
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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