There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Dignity is for republicans.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
