We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
my liver is dry heaving
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize
