i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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