with your own penis?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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