last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
