I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize
