i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
