Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
