If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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