Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
