You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
