dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize