I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I need a hoe opinion
go on
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
