Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
