I think my fart just growled at me.
high people should be assigned attendants
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
NoShamevember. You game?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
