Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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