Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
