i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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