my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize