She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
