I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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