Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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