So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
