you traded sex for a burrito?
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
