Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
