Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I just had sex on a roof
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize