his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
