Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
