he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Randomize
